I’m generally not against spending money. I am however generally against buying things. This is a point I’ve surely beaten well beyond death by now, so I won’t belabor it much further. It’s just to say that I want to be really sure something makes sense within the larger context of my life before I buy it and have to deal with it forever.

I only mention this because I’ve been on a bit of a purchasing spree (by my standards) as of late, which is at least part of the reason I’ve been so quiet on here for the past two months. The other part of the reason is that I’m just generally bad at blogging. Anyway, this post (and the next two), will talk about some of the purchases I’ve made, mostly over the past few weeks. This first one’s not all that contentious, but I promise they’ll get more questionable as we go. Okay, on to the post.

While it’s not an outright lie to say I have a car, it’s probably a bit disingenuous. As recently discussed, calling it a two-seater with some generous trunk space is definitely pushing it (but technically correct).

More accurately, I have an eleven-and-a-half foot tall, four-to-five ton, screaming metal death trap on wheels. From that description (and my past ramblings), it’s not particularly shocking that I try not to drive it, but there’s actually a whole host of reasons I stay away from behind the wheel.

I’d like to start with a eulogy.

We’re gathered here today to mourn the loss of a close friend. His duration in our lives was swift and fleeting, almost ephemeral. His presence was electric, his absence left a hole in my heart, not to mention a deficit in my transportation abilities. Yes, I’m talking about the passing of our beloved friend, my corporate Specialized Turbo.

Before I say anything else, let me just acknowledge that this was entirely my fault. Okay, so remember that awesome electric bike I got through a company pilot program? It turns out that a big stipulation of the program is that the main usage of the bike has to be commuting. Naturally, living on campus, my “commute” doesn’t quite qualify, and so I, with a heavy heart, had to return the bike. In my defense, I was “commuting” to my mailbox (~10 miles away) 3-4 times a week, but that’s still not quite in the spirit of the program.

It’s been a while since my last Home Improvement post, which is bad because it means I’m not improving the truck. And trust me, the truck certainly does have areas for improvement. Anyway, I mentioned that I got a new bike recently. This was great but, like every time I get something new, it posed an issue.

I’m now in possession of a large, 50 pound hunk of metal and rubber, which I have to store somewhere. It makes sense to keep it with me, because:

I like to think I’m pretty environmentally friendly. I try to minimize my waste, take quick showers, and not run unnecessary appliances, like heating and cooling systems. I’m definitely not a super earthy-crunchy-Hippie-type, but I’m at least vaguely cognizant of the atrocities I commit against Mother Nature. My main sin against the planet, aside from just being American, is the fact that I run errands in an 11,500 pound tank that gets 8 MPG on a good day. That’s bad for at least four different reasons, in no particular order: